Taichung Visit to Grandma's tomb and old friends

In spite of a virus I caught, I insisted on toughing it out and going to Taichung with Mom, Ashin, and Noah on Sunday. I couldn't miss the opportunity to see my grandmother's best friends! Who knows if there will be a next time?

We took the freeway commuter's buses, which Noah and Ben have been admiring up and down Kuangfu Road outside of campus. Ubus, Aloha, Tonglian, Yalian, Hsinchu Keyuan, Taichung Keyuan..., they know them all by name, color, and by route. We make it a family game to see who identifies the buses first, so you hear Ben blurting out "Guoguanghao" even before we exit the university! It's pretty funny, and comes to show how frequent these inter-city buses run and what a competitive market it is. Take the Hsinchu-Taipei route for example, you can always catch a bus within 10 minutes.

Taichung (literally means 'central Taiwan') is about 1.5 hours from Hsinchu. The second or third largest city in Taiwan, it is known for mild weather, good (gourmet) food (well, just like everywhere else in Taiwan!) and snacks. Our connection with the city is that my mom grew up here. She came to Taiwan at the age of 4, and Taichung was their home until she went to high school. We used to visit Taichung every year to "sweep the grave" of my grandmother, who we never had the previlige of meeting since she died very young at the age of 44.

We took a taxi to grandma's tomb from the bus stop. Since it's near the annual spring ("tomb-sweeping") season, the cemetery was quite busy, with lots of gold-money burning and rituals of all sorts to commemorate the dead. Grandma's tombstone is in tact, but we would need more tools--knifes and gloves--to clean up the area, and we plan to do that with both of my grandparents' graves before we leave Taiwan. I tried to explain to Noah the whole connection, and we took three bows to grandma. As I introduced this person whose picture on the tombstone looked so young, I realized that, shockingly, my husband may soon outlive my own grandmother.

As a youngster, I had numerous memories of visiting grandparents' graves. It was always kind of sad as we took our bows. I remember even as a little child how I felt bad for my mom, uncle and aunt that they lost their mom and dad so young. I always looked at the tombstones of nearby tombs. All sorts of information about them are revealed on these stones. I remember the beautiful picture of this 14-year-old girl, the man with two wives (one separated by the 'iron gate': left in China), the guy who died on his birthday, tombs that were never tended to and tombs that remain sparklingly clean. I fantasize about the lives they had. Most of those buried here are Mainlanders, which means they were not entombed with their families and ancestors, which also means they probably left behind loved ones in China, and I realized that this may also mean that there's a higher chance that their children and grandchildren have found themselves abroad, in the US, Canada, Australia or New Zealand.

I think the Chinese in general have more a tradition of visiting the tombs with the entire family. I vaguely recall a belief that a well-tended ancestral tomb protects the offsprings from evil or bad fortune. Don't know how many still believe in this, but I did some lots of visitors today.

Afterwards, we went to visit my mom's childhood bestfriend's family and had lunch with her parents (now 85 and 87; this family shared the same house with my mom's family in Taichung) as well as my grandmother's best friend Yu (now 86) and her children. We have long lost touch with Yu, but through a strange coincidence, we got back in contact. My Mom was embarrased that it took her two days to remember this person!! Boy, they are a bunch of healthy, humerous, and cheerful elderly! I heard that my grandmother, a cashier at the taxes office (basically the equivalent of the IRS), always kept her books with meticulously written calligraphy. Auntie Yu learned this habit from her and until today kept her books with ink and brush. Her children joked that she learned to write 0-9 very beautifully, but not any characters!

Upon hearing that their old home, though vacated, is still standing after 50 some years, we suggested a stop there to take some photos. And I shall save the description of the house until next time, when I can get a hold of the pictures from my sister.