As you know, this year has been inspiring for me in many ways. Besides the beautiful nature which we frequent, I've been able to engage in some interesting intellectual activities and insightful dialogues. Paul, on the other hand, is not so lucky. Of course, he's enjoying the natural scenery and life in Taiwan, but at times, after a whole day of writing, he feels lonesome and bored. (Of course this feeling is heightened when I go off to a great yoga session and he has to stay home and put the kids to bed.) He recently complained that as friendly as people are, they really only talk to me.
I realized that it's true: whenever we hang out with friends, they usually only talk to me in Chinese. I think a big part is due to their fear of speaking English and their false impression that Paul doesn't know any Chinese. So, their shyness to speak English, his shyness to speak Chinese, and my eagerness to talk---all contributed to his feeling left out. This is fine for one or two times, but I think he's getting tired of it.
I should add that I used to be shy speaking English around Chinese speakers who speak English, so actually I may be the one keeping them from speaking English.
We both realized that Paul should have, as originally planned, signed up for something, pottery, Tai-chi, or Chinese classes, whatever. It would have given him a chance to meet his own new friends and have something fun to do aside from the intensity of writing a semantics book.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Hanhan mama, I want to go to your house
I have stimulated a huge desire among Noah's classmates: everyone wants to come to our house! So it all started with one classmate (Chun-chun) who I helped pick up a couple of times since her mom teaches at a college far away. Then another girl (Peiying) whose Mom works in the university's cashier office (near our apartment) got to come. You should have seen their faces when they got to leave school with Noah and me. Peiying even forgot to put on her shoes and left in her slippers for a mountain walk with us! And envious looks of others who watch us leave.
Usually our little houseguests just hang around with us: play with some toys, enjoy a snack, or run around with us on our little hike. Nothing special, and just for an hour or so. But now it's become the coolest thing to do for Noah's classmates. Everyday when I show up, a few kids come up to me and say, "Hanhan mama, wo yao qu ni jia". (Noah's Mom, I want to go to your house.) One girl, Yu-jie, has been begging her Mom who contacted me wondering if I could let her come one day. Of course! I love making little ones happy, and this is at the cost of completely nothing!! Free happiness all around!! Ben loves having big sisters in the house too--as long as they don't grab his cars out of his hands.
The problem is there are 25 kids, and how many will get to come! So I am considering suggesting a "fieldtrip to Noah's house", since it's just 15 minutes away on foot. I know it's silly, as our small apartment has pretty much nothing to offer. (I bet most kids in the class have a lot more toys than us since we are just staying for a short term.) But hey, if the kids think it would be fun, why not!
ps. I have only seen one kid's house. Don't know why, but nobody invites us to their houses. Playdates at someone's house is not common here at all. I realize it's the same for adults--most times people don't gather in homes.
Usually our little houseguests just hang around with us: play with some toys, enjoy a snack, or run around with us on our little hike. Nothing special, and just for an hour or so. But now it's become the coolest thing to do for Noah's classmates. Everyday when I show up, a few kids come up to me and say, "Hanhan mama, wo yao qu ni jia". (Noah's Mom, I want to go to your house.) One girl, Yu-jie, has been begging her Mom who contacted me wondering if I could let her come one day. Of course! I love making little ones happy, and this is at the cost of completely nothing!! Free happiness all around!! Ben loves having big sisters in the house too--as long as they don't grab his cars out of his hands.
The problem is there are 25 kids, and how many will get to come! So I am considering suggesting a "fieldtrip to Noah's house", since it's just 15 minutes away on foot. I know it's silly, as our small apartment has pretty much nothing to offer. (I bet most kids in the class have a lot more toys than us since we are just staying for a short term.) But hey, if the kids think it would be fun, why not!
ps. I have only seen one kid's house. Don't know why, but nobody invites us to their houses. Playdates at someone's house is not common here at all. I realize it's the same for adults--most times people don't gather in homes.
I wanna look!!
I have committed breaking and entering twice in my life. The first time was to get into my childhood house which had been returned to the science institute after we left. We jumped through a window in the night, using a flashlight to guide our way through the very-familiar rooms. I have no feeling of guilt, just the sentimental pleasure of revisiting a place I will always call home.
This time, after all of us hung on the ledges of the wall trying to take a peek of Mom's childhood home, the son of Yu (my grandmother's best friend from 40 years ago), quite ironically a retired military officer, took the lead and jumped over the wall into the yard to open the door from the inside!! You should have been there! As he leaned his hand on the wall by the door (see the last picture), a piece of the wall collapsed, bricks falling on the ground. Luckily a friend grabbed Noah before the debris landed on him. The funniest part, however, is that the 86-year-old Yu somehow got a hold of a broom, ran towards the metal door while yelling at her son, "You idiot!! Get out and I'll beat you to death!" (你這個神經病，出來我要打死你！）Mom, Ashin and I were laughing to the floor as this lady had forgotten that her son is no longer 10 and she 30!
Well, we did get to break in and see the complete ruin which was Mom's home. The military officer who committed the crime got away intact as we the crowd cheered. Noah, however, was shaken by what had happened and said to us, "I think we had better not go in as it may be dangerous." What a law-abiding kid that I should learn a thing or two from!!
(Click on pictures to get a better look.)
This time, after all of us hung on the ledges of the wall trying to take a peek of Mom's childhood home, the son of Yu (my grandmother's best friend from 40 years ago), quite ironically a retired military officer, took the lead and jumped over the wall into the yard to open the door from the inside!! You should have been there! As he leaned his hand on the wall by the door (see the last picture), a piece of the wall collapsed, bricks falling on the ground. Luckily a friend grabbed Noah before the debris landed on him. The funniest part, however, is that the 86-year-old Yu somehow got a hold of a broom, ran towards the metal door while yelling at her son, "You idiot!! Get out and I'll beat you to death!" (你這個神經病，出來我要打死你！）Mom, Ashin and I were laughing to the floor as this lady had forgotten that her son is no longer 10 and she 30!
Well, we did get to break in and see the complete ruin which was Mom's home. The military officer who committed the crime got away intact as we the crowd cheered. Noah, however, was shaken by what had happened and said to us, "I think we had better not go in as it may be dangerous." What a law-abiding kid that I should learn a thing or two from!!
(Click on pictures to get a better look.)
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Taichung Visit to Grandma's tomb and old friends
In spite of a virus I caught, I insisted on toughing it out and going to Taichung with Mom, Ashin, and Noah on Sunday. I couldn't miss the opportunity to see my grandmother's best friends! Who knows if there will be a next time?
We took the freeway commuter's buses, which Noah and Ben have been admiring up and down Kuangfu Road outside of campus. Ubus, Aloha, Tonglian, Yalian, Hsinchu Keyuan, Taichung Keyuan..., they know them all by name, color, and by route. We make it a family game to see who identifies the buses first, so you hear Ben blurting out "Guoguanghao" even before we exit the university! It's pretty funny, and comes to show how frequent these inter-city buses run and what a competitive market it is. Take the Hsinchu-Taipei route for example, you can always catch a bus within 10 minutes.
Taichung (literally means 'central Taiwan') is about 1.5 hours from Hsinchu. The second or third largest city in Taiwan, it is known for mild weather, good (gourmet) food (well, just like everywhere else in Taiwan!) and snacks. Our connection with the city is that my mom grew up here. She came to Taiwan at the age of 4, and Taichung was their home until she went to high school. We used to visit Taichung every year to "sweep the grave" of my grandmother, who we never had the previlige of meeting since she died very young at the age of 44.
We took a taxi to grandma's tomb from the bus stop. Since it's near the annual spring ("tomb-sweeping") season, the cemetery was quite busy, with lots of gold-money burning and rituals of all sorts to commemorate the dead. Grandma's tombstone is in tact, but we would need more tools--knifes and gloves--to clean up the area, and we plan to do that with both of my grandparents' graves before we leave Taiwan. I tried to explain to Noah the whole connection, and we took three bows to grandma. As I introduced this person whose picture on the tombstone looked so young, I realized that, shockingly, my husband may soon outlive my own grandmother.
As a youngster, I had numerous memories of visiting grandparents' graves. It was always kind of sad as we took our bows. I remember even as a little child how I felt bad for my mom, uncle and aunt that they lost their mom and dad so young. I always looked at the tombstones of nearby tombs. All sorts of information about them are revealed on these stones. I remember the beautiful picture of this 14-year-old girl, the man with two wives (one separated by the 'iron gate': left in China), the guy who died on his birthday, tombs that were never tended to and tombs that remain sparklingly clean. I fantasize about the lives they had. Most of those buried here are Mainlanders, which means they were not entombed with their families and ancestors, which also means they probably left behind loved ones in China, and I realized that this may also mean that there's a higher chance that their children and grandchildren have found themselves abroad, in the US, Canada, Australia or New Zealand.
I think the Chinese in general have more a tradition of visiting the tombs with the entire family. I vaguely recall a belief that a well-tended ancestral tomb protects the offsprings from evil or bad fortune. Don't know how many still believe in this, but I did some lots of visitors today.
Afterwards, we went to visit my mom's childhood bestfriend's family and had lunch with her parents (now 85 and 87; this family shared the same house with my mom's family in Taichung) as well as my grandmother's best friend Yu (now 86) and her children. We have long lost touch with Yu, but through a strange coincidence, we got back in contact. My Mom was embarrased that it took her two days to remember this person!! Boy, they are a bunch of healthy, humerous, and cheerful elderly! I heard that my grandmother, a cashier at the taxes office (basically the equivalent of the IRS), always kept her books with meticulously written calligraphy. Auntie Yu learned this habit from her and until today kept her books with ink and brush. Her children joked that she learned to write 0-9 very beautifully, but not any characters!
Upon hearing that their old home, though vacated, is still standing after 50 some years, we suggested a stop there to take some photos. And I shall save the description of the house until next time, when I can get a hold of the pictures from my sister.
We took the freeway commuter's buses, which Noah and Ben have been admiring up and down Kuangfu Road outside of campus. Ubus, Aloha, Tonglian, Yalian, Hsinchu Keyuan, Taichung Keyuan..., they know them all by name, color, and by route. We make it a family game to see who identifies the buses first, so you hear Ben blurting out "Guoguanghao" even before we exit the university! It's pretty funny, and comes to show how frequent these inter-city buses run and what a competitive market it is. Take the Hsinchu-Taipei route for example, you can always catch a bus within 10 minutes.
Taichung (literally means 'central Taiwan') is about 1.5 hours from Hsinchu. The second or third largest city in Taiwan, it is known for mild weather, good (gourmet) food (well, just like everywhere else in Taiwan!) and snacks. Our connection with the city is that my mom grew up here. She came to Taiwan at the age of 4, and Taichung was their home until she went to high school. We used to visit Taichung every year to "sweep the grave" of my grandmother, who we never had the previlige of meeting since she died very young at the age of 44.
We took a taxi to grandma's tomb from the bus stop. Since it's near the annual spring ("tomb-sweeping") season, the cemetery was quite busy, with lots of gold-money burning and rituals of all sorts to commemorate the dead. Grandma's tombstone is in tact, but we would need more tools--knifes and gloves--to clean up the area, and we plan to do that with both of my grandparents' graves before we leave Taiwan. I tried to explain to Noah the whole connection, and we took three bows to grandma. As I introduced this person whose picture on the tombstone looked so young, I realized that, shockingly, my husband may soon outlive my own grandmother.
As a youngster, I had numerous memories of visiting grandparents' graves. It was always kind of sad as we took our bows. I remember even as a little child how I felt bad for my mom, uncle and aunt that they lost their mom and dad so young. I always looked at the tombstones of nearby tombs. All sorts of information about them are revealed on these stones. I remember the beautiful picture of this 14-year-old girl, the man with two wives (one separated by the 'iron gate': left in China), the guy who died on his birthday, tombs that were never tended to and tombs that remain sparklingly clean. I fantasize about the lives they had. Most of those buried here are Mainlanders, which means they were not entombed with their families and ancestors, which also means they probably left behind loved ones in China, and I realized that this may also mean that there's a higher chance that their children and grandchildren have found themselves abroad, in the US, Canada, Australia or New Zealand.
I think the Chinese in general have more a tradition of visiting the tombs with the entire family. I vaguely recall a belief that a well-tended ancestral tomb protects the offsprings from evil or bad fortune. Don't know how many still believe in this, but I did some lots of visitors today.
Afterwards, we went to visit my mom's childhood bestfriend's family and had lunch with her parents (now 85 and 87; this family shared the same house with my mom's family in Taichung) as well as my grandmother's best friend Yu (now 86) and her children. We have long lost touch with Yu, but through a strange coincidence, we got back in contact. My Mom was embarrased that it took her two days to remember this person!! Boy, they are a bunch of healthy, humerous, and cheerful elderly! I heard that my grandmother, a cashier at the taxes office (basically the equivalent of the IRS), always kept her books with meticulously written calligraphy. Auntie Yu learned this habit from her and until today kept her books with ink and brush. Her children joked that she learned to write 0-9 very beautifully, but not any characters!
Upon hearing that their old home, though vacated, is still standing after 50 some years, we suggested a stop there to take some photos. And I shall save the description of the house until next time, when I can get a hold of the pictures from my sister.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Carseats and Masks
When you personally experience two different cultures side by side, the tremendous power of socialization becomes scarily clear.
In the US, every baby and toddler uses a carseat. It's done from Day 1 and never contested or protested. As much as kids hate long car rides, few threaten to escape from the snuggly tight five-point harness straps! In comparison, Taiwan little riders at not all so cooperative with being strapped down. Why? Because they've had it otherwise.
In Taiwan, kids and adults alike often wear masks. Whether it's to prevent a person with a cold from spreading the germs, to block the car fume, to protect against cold cold air, to keep healthcare workers from the risks of airborne diseases, masks are a common part of life. For little ones, choices of cute masks abound: Hello Kitty, little animals, pretty lace, trucks, Thomas the Tank Engine.... When I first got here, I had a hard time believing that a 3-year-old would keep her mask on for a length of time, covering her own face except for the eyes and forehead. It seemed rather uncomfortable and distracting. Hey, they do keep them on! More funny is that both of our kids have asked for them! Ben loves his with a kitty cat on it, and Noah was happy when the teacher gave him a surgical mask after his cough attacks!
It shows you that you behave according to the environment and norms and expectations you've been exposed to. Taiwanese kids' attitudes towards a carseat is just like American kids' attitudes towards a mask. So, when a kid is kept in a crib or a car repair shop all day while the parents sell buns/fix cars, that little space becomes his world. When a kid is beaten and cursed at daily, .... It is scary to continue with this line of thought. Sorry from the grim ending. I guess my sensitivity to parenting practices is heightened.
In the US, every baby and toddler uses a carseat. It's done from Day 1 and never contested or protested. As much as kids hate long car rides, few threaten to escape from the snuggly tight five-point harness straps! In comparison, Taiwan little riders at not all so cooperative with being strapped down. Why? Because they've had it otherwise.
In Taiwan, kids and adults alike often wear masks. Whether it's to prevent a person with a cold from spreading the germs, to block the car fume, to protect against cold cold air, to keep healthcare workers from the risks of airborne diseases, masks are a common part of life. For little ones, choices of cute masks abound: Hello Kitty, little animals, pretty lace, trucks, Thomas the Tank Engine.... When I first got here, I had a hard time believing that a 3-year-old would keep her mask on for a length of time, covering her own face except for the eyes and forehead. It seemed rather uncomfortable and distracting. Hey, they do keep them on! More funny is that both of our kids have asked for them! Ben loves his with a kitty cat on it, and Noah was happy when the teacher gave him a surgical mask after his cough attacks!
It shows you that you behave according to the environment and norms and expectations you've been exposed to. Taiwanese kids' attitudes towards a carseat is just like American kids' attitudes towards a mask. So, when a kid is kept in a crib or a car repair shop all day while the parents sell buns/fix cars, that little space becomes his world. When a kid is beaten and cursed at daily, .... It is scary to continue with this line of thought. Sorry from the grim ending. I guess my sensitivity to parenting practices is heightened.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
A tip on hiking with young children
Since we came to Taiwan, hiking (perhaps ‘walking around in the mountains” is a more precise way to put it) has become almost a weekly activity. This is in part thanks to “Tony” and his website: http://www.tonyhuang39.com/index.html. For parents, we have a tip for taking young children on hikes: the more varied and uneven the paths are, the happier the kids will be walking by themselves. This may seem odd, but it’s almost 100% true with Ben and Noah. They walk very well and willingly when we wind through dirt roads in the forests, goose-egg-rock-paved (鵝卵石) paths, small paths next to a river bed, even when it involves a lot of climbing up and down. However, when it’s cement-paved and what seems like a easy walk, we start hearing the whining voices going: “I am tired!” “Baba pick me up!” “I don’t want to walk anymore!”
This is why I love Tony’s website. He gives a meticulous account, with pictures and words, of the condition of the paths. Usually before we select a particular hike, we already have a sense of whether it’s shady, uneven, how much is the incline, what kind of vegetation can be expected, and the history and ‘humanistic’ background of the path.
I then take on the role of a family guide, introducing the history and substance of the rice bridges, the bamboo and orange groves, while Paul and Noah teach us about various bugs and worms they encounter. As Noah busily (and quite skillfully!) catches the butterflies and dragonflies with his net, Ben is busy collecting little rocks, which he then throws into a river or over a cliff. The picture above gives you a sense of what each family member’s duties are.
焉知非福 How do you know it’s not fortune?
The Wangs and the Lins live across a manmade pond from each other. Both have about two acres of land, where they grow rice and just enough vegetables to feed the family. Their small homes were quite dilapidated, standing in the middle of the green rice fields. Life is hard for these farmers. They haven’t been able to eat any meat for almost a year.
This morning, two officials showed up at the Wang Family door. Mr. Wang could not believe his ears when he heard that the government has offered to buy his land for 200 dollars. That’s enough money to find build a new home in the nearby city and feed the entire family for months!! The construction project for the defense science lab is said to begin in a few months, and the family will have sufficient time to move out. Though they were sad to have to leave the home and relocate their ancestral tomb—a place they’ve called home for three generations, the offer was simply too handsome to even think twice.
When Mr. Lin heard about the deal, he immediately inquired about why the officials never went to his home. He even offered to sell his land for just 100 dollars, but was declined. He was so jealous of his neighbors. Ten other homes across the pond were sold near them for handsome prices, but not his! They weren’t chosen, and had to stay and farm this piece of hilly land where nothing grows well.
Forty years later, the Lins find their home situated in the center of a small but burgeoning town. Their traditional home has been turned into a 8-story muti-purpose complex filled with condominiums and retail stores. The three brothers in the family each own two units of the condos. One opened a supermarket on the ground floor. Just the rent from the condos easily pays for their children’s school, including sending their kids to bilingual kindergarten with American teachers! The Wangs, on the other hand, stay in their noodle business in the city 15 km north of their original home. They have gone to numerous protests against the KMT, who “forcefully took away” their land and their ancestral tombs, leaving them without money or land. “Give me back our land! We want justice!”
Who is a benefactor? Who is a victim? Is it fortune or misfortune? Will time tell?
This morning, two officials showed up at the Wang Family door. Mr. Wang could not believe his ears when he heard that the government has offered to buy his land for 200 dollars. That’s enough money to find build a new home in the nearby city and feed the entire family for months!! The construction project for the defense science lab is said to begin in a few months, and the family will have sufficient time to move out. Though they were sad to have to leave the home and relocate their ancestral tomb—a place they’ve called home for three generations, the offer was simply too handsome to even think twice.
When Mr. Lin heard about the deal, he immediately inquired about why the officials never went to his home. He even offered to sell his land for just 100 dollars, but was declined. He was so jealous of his neighbors. Ten other homes across the pond were sold near them for handsome prices, but not his! They weren’t chosen, and had to stay and farm this piece of hilly land where nothing grows well.
Forty years later, the Lins find their home situated in the center of a small but burgeoning town. Their traditional home has been turned into a 8-story muti-purpose complex filled with condominiums and retail stores. The three brothers in the family each own two units of the condos. One opened a supermarket on the ground floor. Just the rent from the condos easily pays for their children’s school, including sending their kids to bilingual kindergarten with American teachers! The Wangs, on the other hand, stay in their noodle business in the city 15 km north of their original home. They have gone to numerous protests against the KMT, who “forcefully took away” their land and their ancestral tombs, leaving them without money or land. “Give me back our land! We want justice!”
Who is a benefactor? Who is a victim? Is it fortune or misfortune? Will time tell?
Two sides of the same coin
In Taiwan, it is very easy to take kids to any restaurants or "nice" places. You generally don’t have to worry about bothering people or eliciting annoyed looks. (Unless you have mixed kids and mind questions such as “Are they mixed?" and "Where is their father from?”) People are very laid back and highly tolerant of disorderly behaviors.
I have connected this feeling of ease with the other side of the same coin: this high tolerance is what permits rude behavior, such as parking in a narrow street to convenient block cars from passing, and talking on a cell phone during a movie. These seemingly (to me at least) ridiculously selfish acts are not very frowned upon. The tolerant people will squeeze by the street (even when it involves some yogic twists or jumps) and continue watching their movie.
One time I was in a spa in Country X, I stepped into the all-female naked sauna. As I sat down, having the towel wrapped around my waist, I saw six unfriendly eyes staring at me. One old lady immediately spoke up, pointing to my thighs with despise. I was asked to not let any part of my bare body touch the wooden bench. After I have corrected my posture to sit on the towel, those six eyes wouldn’t let me go, until I was so comfortable that I left. This is the same country that has much prettier façade and orderly urban planning than Taiwan.
So, as simplistic as this comparison may be, I cannot help but wonder whether I prefer an easy-going, warm, and disorderly place, or strict, cold, and highly orderly one.
I have connected this feeling of ease with the other side of the same coin: this high tolerance is what permits rude behavior, such as parking in a narrow street to convenient block cars from passing, and talking on a cell phone during a movie. These seemingly (to me at least) ridiculously selfish acts are not very frowned upon. The tolerant people will squeeze by the street (even when it involves some yogic twists or jumps) and continue watching their movie.
One time I was in a spa in Country X, I stepped into the all-female naked sauna. As I sat down, having the towel wrapped around my waist, I saw six unfriendly eyes staring at me. One old lady immediately spoke up, pointing to my thighs with despise. I was asked to not let any part of my bare body touch the wooden bench. After I have corrected my posture to sit on the towel, those six eyes wouldn’t let me go, until I was so comfortable that I left. This is the same country that has much prettier façade and orderly urban planning than Taiwan.
So, as simplistic as this comparison may be, I cannot help but wonder whether I prefer an easy-going, warm, and disorderly place, or strict, cold, and highly orderly one.
Thursday, March 15, 2007
cookie making with Noah's class
Today I offered to teach the kids at Noah's class how to make chewy oatmeal raisin cookies. In the US, I am by no means a baker--my friends are definitely a notch above me. Kristi, Jade, Jessie, Linda, just to name a few superior bakers.... However, here I am considered a superb baker -- well, that's after having baked once or twice, but from scratch! All of a sudden these flattering voices have heightend my self esteem as a baker.
Those 20 kids--85% of them I know by name by now, thanks to my teacherly instinct--had a ball mashing bananas (I okayed their use of fingers, to the surprise of most kids and the teachers, but what fun!!), stirring flour, mixing eggs and sugars and butter, decorating with chocolate chips, measuring oats and raisins, and waiting and waiting and waiting. Well, I tripled the recipe, only to find that there is only one small electric oven in the whole school. So, we have to bake batch by batch, 8 at a time! I think back to all those huge ovens in the US with envy...
Here I am, promoting American "cuisine". What can I make with Noah's American friends after we get back? This is a question that I need to ponder....
Those 20 kids--85% of them I know by name by now, thanks to my teacherly instinct--had a ball mashing bananas (I okayed their use of fingers, to the surprise of most kids and the teachers, but what fun!!), stirring flour, mixing eggs and sugars and butter, decorating with chocolate chips, measuring oats and raisins, and waiting and waiting and waiting. Well, I tripled the recipe, only to find that there is only one small electric oven in the whole school. So, we have to bake batch by batch, 8 at a time! I think back to all those huge ovens in the US with envy...
Here I am, promoting American "cuisine". What can I make with Noah's American friends after we get back? This is a question that I need to ponder....
I need another yoga teacher!
My yoga teacher is depressing me. She always demands very advanced poses with twists and bends and maximum stretches. That's fine. I don't mind and actually enjoy being challenged. The problem is when people have trouble--which I don't blame them, she started her "health and beauty" talk, or more, talk of fitness and longevity, or worse, threatening us that if we don't keep doing yoga, we'll lose all of the healthy and desirable qualities.
I don't fear that I would actually buy into all of this supposedly inspirational talk. It annoys me because I feel that she is misrepresenting the true spirit of the practice. I definitely don't do yoga just to keep healthy, strong or beautiful. And I don't endure pain in order to get the positive results. I don't think other students should either.
You probably remember that at the beginning of my yoga lessons in Taiwan, it was so refreshing to meet this teacher who doesn't offer (excessive) praise and all this "you-are-doing-great" and "relaaaaaxxxx... be in the moment" kind of rosy talk. It was nice to simply be commanded to do the poses and enjoy the sweat and stretches. Now months later the pendulum has swung back. I feel that I need some connection between mind, body, and spirit. I will be happy to find a new teacher in CA and recenter myself in my practice.
I don't fear that I would actually buy into all of this supposedly inspirational talk. It annoys me because I feel that she is misrepresenting the true spirit of the practice. I definitely don't do yoga just to keep healthy, strong or beautiful. And I don't endure pain in order to get the positive results. I don't think other students should either.
You probably remember that at the beginning of my yoga lessons in Taiwan, it was so refreshing to meet this teacher who doesn't offer (excessive) praise and all this "you-are-doing-great" and "relaaaaaxxxx... be in the moment" kind of rosy talk. It was nice to simply be commanded to do the poses and enjoy the sweat and stretches. Now months later the pendulum has swung back. I feel that I need some connection between mind, body, and spirit. I will be happy to find a new teacher in CA and recenter myself in my practice.
Monday, March 12, 2007
Meeting my favorite author
Lately, I've been trying to read all the books by my current idol, Lung Ying Tai. The reason why I am so attracted to her is that I share many of her thoughts and concerns, and what's great is that she can articulate them much better than I can. This makes reading her words feel like "a good scratch on the itchy spot", pardon my very earthy analogy. To me, she represents someone with passionate human and social concerns, while having an extremely analytic and sober mind. She is unforgiving of injustices and causes of social problems, and she will not let any of her concerns go unnoticed. In other words, she is provokative, passionate, and really makes you think and think twice. From my little bit of interactions with Taiwanese students, I feel that she is the kind of teacher and scholar we desperately need, to guide us in challenging the status quo and rethinking our values and priorities, and encouraging us to have a heart/mind for the underprivileged.
Okay, I can go on and on, as I am sort of in her world after reading all these books. But just the last few days, I heard from various sources that she is actually around--quite literally, on campus!! I knew she was a visiting scholar at Tsinghua, and was at onetime actually a resident in this building and a diner at our downstairs cafeteria. I had been secretly checking her sign-in page--which is in the same booklet as our entry--to see whether she has come back to eat, but she hasn't since last summer.
Anyway, at a very interesting lunch gathering today, I found out that as part of her "Thinkers' Club", Prof. Lung is teaching a class on Monday evenings. So I skipped dinner and biked to her class. You know how it is before meeting your idol? You are nervous because you are both excited and afraid that the real thing won't match your expectations.
Well, her person and her words match quite beautifully. Though it was not a real lecture, rather her guiding the students in organizing an event and crafting the poster and press release (for a talk about North Korea in two weeks), I still learned a great deal, about writing, advertising, teaching, and thinking. Today, I was too shy and didn't introduce myself. Now that I know she is around, I am happy to knowI'll get to hear her again in person soon.
Okay, I can go on and on, as I am sort of in her world after reading all these books. But just the last few days, I heard from various sources that she is actually around--quite literally, on campus!! I knew she was a visiting scholar at Tsinghua, and was at onetime actually a resident in this building and a diner at our downstairs cafeteria. I had been secretly checking her sign-in page--which is in the same booklet as our entry--to see whether she has come back to eat, but she hasn't since last summer.
Anyway, at a very interesting lunch gathering today, I found out that as part of her "Thinkers' Club", Prof. Lung is teaching a class on Monday evenings. So I skipped dinner and biked to her class. You know how it is before meeting your idol? You are nervous because you are both excited and afraid that the real thing won't match your expectations.
Well, her person and her words match quite beautifully. Though it was not a real lecture, rather her guiding the students in organizing an event and crafting the poster and press release (for a talk about North Korea in two weeks), I still learned a great deal, about writing, advertising, teaching, and thinking. Today, I was too shy and didn't introduce myself. Now that I know she is around, I am happy to knowI'll get to hear her again in person soon.
The "Cat Cafe"
We frequent "the cat cafe" on campus, a very quaint second-hand bookstore/cafe in the center of campus. The owner, "Mao-ge" (cat brother), a philosopher and avid book reader and collector, has a passion for cats, so various kittens and stray cats somehow find themselves under his loving care. This past week, two tiny 2-week-old kittens were brought to Mao-ge, who nursed them to health and maturity, when they were ready to be adopted. We visited the kittens regularly. The kids got to fed them with a bottle---they were the size of a palm at first. Even I, not being much of a cat fan, was touched by their adorable cuteness! By this Friday, both had found a home to go to. So now we just visit Mao-ge's own cats, who tend to be napping and our boys tend to wake them up from some guest's lap. Lovely place, great books, good coffee, and a very interesting owner with an admirable vision. They hold film festivals, jazz concerts, lectures/discussions here regularly in addition to drinks and meals.
I hope this place survives, as this science and technology-oriented university could really use such a nice forum for social, cultural, and literary gatherings. Not only so, it provides a space to slow down, which is much needed here.
Friday, March 09, 2007
Tainan temple, crab beach
Just a few recent pictures. A beautiful temple in Tainan, and the beach we stopped off at on the way home (just to stretch our legs, but had a great time with the thousands of hermit crabs).
Thursday, March 08, 2007
No slides! It's too dirty (or cold/late/dangerous)!
Sometimes observing the seemingly absurd parenting practice can teach me something.
Our family frequents the college campus. Noah on the hike, Ben stroller, or both carrying balls or butterfly nets, a walk to the "cats" cafe, a stroll to visit the turtles in the lake, or to the stairs in front of the math department to enjoy the "slides", or to climb the old trees all around campus.
We often see grandparents bringing their youngsters for a stroll. They don't live on campus, but in the surrounding neighborhood. Seeing a grandmother holding hands with three young girls, two around Noah's age, I suggested that they take a walk to the lake, "We just saw lots of fish and turtles today. The girls would like that," I said. "Oh, too dangerous! I have three kids to care for." "Oh then.. right next to that building is a small children's playground. Have you been there?" "I know, but it's too dirty. I have bathed them already. Winter time, we bath during daylight so they don't catch a cold. We'll just walk," she smiled politely and led the girls on. (Of course, like always I also got my routine questions of "Are they mixed? Where does their father come from? Do they speak English or Chinese?, blahblahblah.)
One of Noah's classmates, "Jia", is sort of hyperactive. Ben is terrified of him because every time we go to the school, he always rips Ben's toy out of his hands, sometimes he would squeeze his face just for fun. Ben even said to me, "Didi bu pa" (younger brother don't be afraid) after spotting this kid in the classroom. One time Jia told me, "This is a school of big kids. Your son should not come. He is too small!" Anyway, though usually harmless, Jia is not the most likable kid in the class. I noticed that when we have activities involving parents, his parents never showed up. He is dropped off and picked up by his grandma.
It was a beautiful day. As usual, after Ben and I picked up Noah, we went to the adjacent playground to enjoy the huge concrete slides--yes, 3 ultra-long slides made up concrete, very slippery and even thrilling for me! Not the safest or cleanest kind for sure but plenty of fun). When Jia walked by with his grandmother, he asked to go on with Noah for just a while. "Not Allowed!" she said loudly, "Grandma doesn't have time! It's late and we have to rush! Come on!" She dragged his hands and walked on.
I don't think the grandmother saw Jia's disappointed face. She is in too much of a rush, though I don't know where to. I wonder, if your parent never says hello to people, do you get to learn how to interact with others? If your going to school is seen only as a place to keep you while parents work, and your parents never participate in any activities with you at school, do you have a reason to behave nicely and be a friendly presence?
Too cold to go outside. Too dangerous to visit the lake. Too late to play with friends. Too dirty to get on the slides. What's left for a kid to do in these limited few years of her childhood?
Our family frequents the college campus. Noah on the hike, Ben stroller, or both carrying balls or butterfly nets, a walk to the "cats" cafe, a stroll to visit the turtles in the lake, or to the stairs in front of the math department to enjoy the "slides", or to climb the old trees all around campus.
We often see grandparents bringing their youngsters for a stroll. They don't live on campus, but in the surrounding neighborhood. Seeing a grandmother holding hands with three young girls, two around Noah's age, I suggested that they take a walk to the lake, "We just saw lots of fish and turtles today. The girls would like that," I said. "Oh, too dangerous! I have three kids to care for." "Oh then.. right next to that building is a small children's playground. Have you been there?" "I know, but it's too dirty. I have bathed them already. Winter time, we bath during daylight so they don't catch a cold. We'll just walk," she smiled politely and led the girls on. (Of course, like always I also got my routine questions of "Are they mixed? Where does their father come from? Do they speak English or Chinese?, blahblahblah.)
One of Noah's classmates, "Jia", is sort of hyperactive. Ben is terrified of him because every time we go to the school, he always rips Ben's toy out of his hands, sometimes he would squeeze his face just for fun. Ben even said to me, "Didi bu pa" (younger brother don't be afraid) after spotting this kid in the classroom. One time Jia told me, "This is a school of big kids. Your son should not come. He is too small!" Anyway, though usually harmless, Jia is not the most likable kid in the class. I noticed that when we have activities involving parents, his parents never showed up. He is dropped off and picked up by his grandma.
It was a beautiful day. As usual, after Ben and I picked up Noah, we went to the adjacent playground to enjoy the huge concrete slides--yes, 3 ultra-long slides made up concrete, very slippery and even thrilling for me! Not the safest or cleanest kind for sure but plenty of fun). When Jia walked by with his grandmother, he asked to go on with Noah for just a while. "Not Allowed!" she said loudly, "Grandma doesn't have time! It's late and we have to rush! Come on!" She dragged his hands and walked on.
I don't think the grandmother saw Jia's disappointed face. She is in too much of a rush, though I don't know where to. I wonder, if your parent never says hello to people, do you get to learn how to interact with others? If your going to school is seen only as a place to keep you while parents work, and your parents never participate in any activities with you at school, do you have a reason to behave nicely and be a friendly presence?
Too cold to go outside. Too dangerous to visit the lake. Too late to play with friends. Too dirty to get on the slides. What's left for a kid to do in these limited few years of her childhood?
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
買菜樂 Buying-Vegetable-Fun
Every time after I shop at the local market in the morning, I feel a warm feeling of humanity and connection, a feeling I don't get at the grocery stores in Taiwan or in the US. How should I explain this? Well, let me first recount today's shopping trip.
I always start at the corner tofu stand, tended by an older beared man and his son. "What to eat today?" the son asked, "Hmm.. how about two blocks of tofu?" He swiftly lifted up two blocks of fresh tofu, still warm from the wooden board. I moved on.
Two stands down the dumpling lady noticed me, "Miss, where's your little boy?" "At school this morning." "Do you live here?" "Well, we are here for 10 months, will be leaving in the summer." "So you immigrated to the US already?" "Well, yeah, I've lived there a long time." "Oh, that's so good." I smiled and walked on. (She must have remembered seeing me with either Paul or Mary speaking English one time; that's why she asked.)
Since today was pretty wet and cold, I thought a chicken soup with shitake mushrooms would be nice. At the chicken stand, chickens--whole with head, half, quarter, or drumsticks--were lying on the stand in front of the woman. I asked how much were the quartered thighs/legs, and she told me there were three kinds of chicken, "Roaming-mountain chicken", "Pearl chicken", and "half-earth chicken" (mixed breed I assume). She remembered I had children, and recommended the tenderer pearl chicken for soup. Of course, I had the privelege of letting her chop it up into chuncks with her butcher's knife.
Across fron the chicken stand was a couple squatting on the floor selling vegetables, all kinds of leafy greens looking very fresh. Last week this lady gave Ben half of a tangerine that she was eating, and Ben loved it and asked for more. A very friendly woman: "Where's your little boy?" "Oh at school." "What would you like to eat? Help yourself pick them out," she handed me a plastic bag." "Do you grow all these beautiful veggies?" "They are from a releative's farm in the hills. All picked this morning." She saw me eyeing the vegetable hearts (cai-xin), "These go really well with birds' eggs. Kids will love it." I said, "Don't you have to peal it? It's too much trouble." She said, "Oh I'll peel it for you." "How nice of you! I'll definitely try one then." I remember she, like me, has two boys, except they are adults. Right before the New Year, I had asked her whether the children were returning home for a reunion. She said they both still live at home, one works and the other just hangs around. "Neither are married. Nobody wants to marry poor people like us," she said with a slight smile. "Oh I am sure they'll find girls they like," what can I say!
Then I saw a woman with fresh hand-made noodles next to the vegetable stand. "Come try some of my noodles. I just made them this morning." "Oh what a good idea.... I am making a soup and I can put noodles in it." "I also make knife-shredded noodles (dao-xiao-mian), but today they are sold out. Come back tomorrow and try them!" "Oh we love dao-xiao-mian!" I bought 2 dollars worth of fresh wheat noodles for tonight's chicken soup.
Next to the noodle lady, a couple was sitting on the stool looking at me. The woman said with a smile, "Korean kimchi. I made it. Please come try. Don't have to buy any. Just sample some." I sampled the non-spicy ones. They were pretty good, but at that point, seeing the couple anxiously looking at my reaction, I lost my judgement of taste. I bought some (a total of 3 dollars worth). Ben loves turnip, so I got some turnip kimchi, and I like cabbage kimchi. It would have gone well with our soup tonight, but I forgot it.
I then went to the corner fruit couple for some grapes, pears, wax apples, guava, loquat. They didn't have the baby bananas I liked, so I had to go in the alley for the grandma who sells bananas and papayas of all sorts.
Heading home on the bike with a basket and arms full of veggies and fruits, I felt very content, not just for my family's tummies, but for myself. Somehow it's very nice to be dealing with people who directly interact in some way your food, either by growing it, harvesting it, catching it, or even butchering it. It is even nicer to meet them as people like you and me, a mother of someone, a daughter of someone, a cousin of someone. And when urged to spend 1 or 2 dollars buying someone's homemade food, though I feel a little pressure (not wanting to hurt someone's feelings), it's the kind of money I don't mind spending. A short trip like this gets me to see lots of faces, talk about what I love--food--and it just feels much better than Costco or Giant!
I always start at the corner tofu stand, tended by an older beared man and his son. "What to eat today?" the son asked, "Hmm.. how about two blocks of tofu?" He swiftly lifted up two blocks of fresh tofu, still warm from the wooden board. I moved on.
Two stands down the dumpling lady noticed me, "Miss, where's your little boy?" "At school this morning." "Do you live here?" "Well, we are here for 10 months, will be leaving in the summer." "So you immigrated to the US already?" "Well, yeah, I've lived there a long time." "Oh, that's so good." I smiled and walked on. (She must have remembered seeing me with either Paul or Mary speaking English one time; that's why she asked.)
Since today was pretty wet and cold, I thought a chicken soup with shitake mushrooms would be nice. At the chicken stand, chickens--whole with head, half, quarter, or drumsticks--were lying on the stand in front of the woman. I asked how much were the quartered thighs/legs, and she told me there were three kinds of chicken, "Roaming-mountain chicken", "Pearl chicken", and "half-earth chicken" (mixed breed I assume). She remembered I had children, and recommended the tenderer pearl chicken for soup. Of course, I had the privelege of letting her chop it up into chuncks with her butcher's knife.
Across fron the chicken stand was a couple squatting on the floor selling vegetables, all kinds of leafy greens looking very fresh. Last week this lady gave Ben half of a tangerine that she was eating, and Ben loved it and asked for more. A very friendly woman: "Where's your little boy?" "Oh at school." "What would you like to eat? Help yourself pick them out," she handed me a plastic bag." "Do you grow all these beautiful veggies?" "They are from a releative's farm in the hills. All picked this morning." She saw me eyeing the vegetable hearts (cai-xin), "These go really well with birds' eggs. Kids will love it." I said, "Don't you have to peal it? It's too much trouble." She said, "Oh I'll peel it for you." "How nice of you! I'll definitely try one then." I remember she, like me, has two boys, except they are adults. Right before the New Year, I had asked her whether the children were returning home for a reunion. She said they both still live at home, one works and the other just hangs around. "Neither are married. Nobody wants to marry poor people like us," she said with a slight smile. "Oh I am sure they'll find girls they like," what can I say!
Then I saw a woman with fresh hand-made noodles next to the vegetable stand. "Come try some of my noodles. I just made them this morning." "Oh what a good idea.... I am making a soup and I can put noodles in it." "I also make knife-shredded noodles (dao-xiao-mian), but today they are sold out. Come back tomorrow and try them!" "Oh we love dao-xiao-mian!" I bought 2 dollars worth of fresh wheat noodles for tonight's chicken soup.
Next to the noodle lady, a couple was sitting on the stool looking at me. The woman said with a smile, "Korean kimchi. I made it. Please come try. Don't have to buy any. Just sample some." I sampled the non-spicy ones. They were pretty good, but at that point, seeing the couple anxiously looking at my reaction, I lost my judgement of taste. I bought some (a total of 3 dollars worth). Ben loves turnip, so I got some turnip kimchi, and I like cabbage kimchi. It would have gone well with our soup tonight, but I forgot it.
I then went to the corner fruit couple for some grapes, pears, wax apples, guava, loquat. They didn't have the baby bananas I liked, so I had to go in the alley for the grandma who sells bananas and papayas of all sorts.
Heading home on the bike with a basket and arms full of veggies and fruits, I felt very content, not just for my family's tummies, but for myself. Somehow it's very nice to be dealing with people who directly interact in some way your food, either by growing it, harvesting it, catching it, or even butchering it. It is even nicer to meet them as people like you and me, a mother of someone, a daughter of someone, a cousin of someone. And when urged to spend 1 or 2 dollars buying someone's homemade food, though I feel a little pressure (not wanting to hurt someone's feelings), it's the kind of money I don't mind spending. A short trip like this gets me to see lots of faces, talk about what I love--food--and it just feels much better than Costco or Giant!
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Driving North and South
We've heard many times that in the South, drivers are more aggressive, rude, and the traffic scene more chaotic. Well, we've compared drivers in the north vs. south with our own eyes twice by now, and our conclusion is totally different.
Last weekend we took a car trip to Tainan, the historic city in the south, about 45 minutes north of Kaohsiung. It was a city filled with historic relics, especially temples all shapes and sizes. Tainan is the oldest city in Taiwan, and it dates back to the 1600s when the Ming Dynasty officials landed in Taiwan and successfully chased out the Dutch. The temples are amazing, and the xiao-chi ('small eats') of various sorts (soup noodles, fish soup, spring rolls, to name just a few) well deserve their fame. We stayed with our old sister friends at a convent/Catholic high school. The sisters and our boys enjoyed playing with each other at their beautiful and spotless clean campus.
Back to driving... Southern drivers are not at all more rude. If anything, we found Hsinchu to have the most aggressive drivers. In Tainan, as well as in Kending, we didn't have trouble driving at all. This tells you the scary nature of rumors and stereotypes...
Last weekend we took a car trip to Tainan, the historic city in the south, about 45 minutes north of Kaohsiung. It was a city filled with historic relics, especially temples all shapes and sizes. Tainan is the oldest city in Taiwan, and it dates back to the 1600s when the Ming Dynasty officials landed in Taiwan and successfully chased out the Dutch. The temples are amazing, and the xiao-chi ('small eats') of various sorts (soup noodles, fish soup, spring rolls, to name just a few) well deserve their fame. We stayed with our old sister friends at a convent/Catholic high school. The sisters and our boys enjoyed playing with each other at their beautiful and spotless clean campus.
Back to driving... Southern drivers are not at all more rude. If anything, we found Hsinchu to have the most aggressive drivers. In Tainan, as well as in Kending, we didn't have trouble driving at all. This tells you the scary nature of rumors and stereotypes...
Thursday, March 01, 2007
外食族 Out-Diner
While I am again writing about food, this is not about any particular food, but my observation of one aspect of Taiwanese eating habits, something I consider a rather unique social phenomenon.
Compared to any countries rich or poor, big or small, in fact any place I can think of except for maybe Hong Kong, Taiwan probably has the most number of people who dine out everyday. Remember how I was so excited to take a long break from cooking? It's easy to want to "solve the eating problem" by eating out. Food is cheap, decent, varied, and highly accessible--you can't go more than 5 minutes anywhere in the city without access to inexpensive food). According to my very informal survey of folks in Hsinchu, the majority of people around us do not cook regularly. This includes families with kids at Noah's school, hairdressers, students, professors, construction workers, people from very diverse backgrounds.
Now that I've been here for a length of time, this phenomenon is beginning to strike me as perhaps not so positive. It can have a number of implications: First, people overwork, leaving themselves with little time to fix a meal for themselves. Families with both parents working end up grabbing something on their way home. Secondly, space is a big issue. Many housing situations for young people have no or limited kitchen access. Thirdly, chinese people generally do not have a taste for cold food such as sandwiches or salads as the main part of a meal. People expect rice and hot dishes for almost every meal, and how do they get a balance of three-four dishes to go with their big bowl of rice? The cheapest, simplest, quickest solution is a bian-dang/bento/meal box. For $50-100 (2-3 dollars), you can get a decent combination of veggies and protein with generous amount of white rice. This is the default meal for many Taiwanese. Finally, the supply and demand of eating out have reached some sort of equilibrium, and everyone's taking it for granted, though when I ask people how they eat, the out-diners usually don't sound very happy with their eating situation. When I first got here, I was jealous of their wide array of choices and couldn't understand why they are not happy. Now I think I see it. I love cooking, especially I love cooking for my family. I know that when I cook, the food is clean, light, nutritious and healthy. Though food on the streets is good, they are best for visitors (if you spend two weeks in Taiwan, you'll love sampling everything on the streets), and eating them everyday year in and year out becomes monotonous.
And if there were a set number of criteria on which to evaluate casual foods offered on the streets, I believe EXPEDIENCY would be ranked the highest. Everything is delivered at lightening speed, this includes noodles, buns, bento, fresh juices and smoothies, tea, dessert. It seems like the first trait one has to possess when discerning going into casual food vending is whether you can be ultra-expedient in everything from chopping veggies, assembling a lunch box, handling change to cleaning up--this is more important that your cooking ability. While this is obviously better than generic MacDonald fast food, I am weary of the focus on being fast because this compromises a sense of elegance and calm that would be nice to be associated with eating. Besides, it's not good for you to eat so fast.
Of course, there are still many families eating mom's or dad's cooking at home, like we used to do. I am just so glad my mom cooked for us every day.
Compared to any countries rich or poor, big or small, in fact any place I can think of except for maybe Hong Kong, Taiwan probably has the most number of people who dine out everyday. Remember how I was so excited to take a long break from cooking? It's easy to want to "solve the eating problem" by eating out. Food is cheap, decent, varied, and highly accessible--you can't go more than 5 minutes anywhere in the city without access to inexpensive food). According to my very informal survey of folks in Hsinchu, the majority of people around us do not cook regularly. This includes families with kids at Noah's school, hairdressers, students, professors, construction workers, people from very diverse backgrounds.
Now that I've been here for a length of time, this phenomenon is beginning to strike me as perhaps not so positive. It can have a number of implications: First, people overwork, leaving themselves with little time to fix a meal for themselves. Families with both parents working end up grabbing something on their way home. Secondly, space is a big issue. Many housing situations for young people have no or limited kitchen access. Thirdly, chinese people generally do not have a taste for cold food such as sandwiches or salads as the main part of a meal. People expect rice and hot dishes for almost every meal, and how do they get a balance of three-four dishes to go with their big bowl of rice? The cheapest, simplest, quickest solution is a bian-dang/bento/meal box. For $50-100 (2-3 dollars), you can get a decent combination of veggies and protein with generous amount of white rice. This is the default meal for many Taiwanese. Finally, the supply and demand of eating out have reached some sort of equilibrium, and everyone's taking it for granted, though when I ask people how they eat, the out-diners usually don't sound very happy with their eating situation. When I first got here, I was jealous of their wide array of choices and couldn't understand why they are not happy. Now I think I see it. I love cooking, especially I love cooking for my family. I know that when I cook, the food is clean, light, nutritious and healthy. Though food on the streets is good, they are best for visitors (if you spend two weeks in Taiwan, you'll love sampling everything on the streets), and eating them everyday year in and year out becomes monotonous.
And if there were a set number of criteria on which to evaluate casual foods offered on the streets, I believe EXPEDIENCY would be ranked the highest. Everything is delivered at lightening speed, this includes noodles, buns, bento, fresh juices and smoothies, tea, dessert. It seems like the first trait one has to possess when discerning going into casual food vending is whether you can be ultra-expedient in everything from chopping veggies, assembling a lunch box, handling change to cleaning up--this is more important that your cooking ability. While this is obviously better than generic MacDonald fast food, I am weary of the focus on being fast because this compromises a sense of elegance and calm that would be nice to be associated with eating. Besides, it's not good for you to eat so fast.
Of course, there are still many families eating mom's or dad's cooking at home, like we used to do. I am just so glad my mom cooked for us every day.
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