Some recent comments by Ben

I. "That brown stuff?"
After a birthday party, I asked Ben what he had to drink with pizza. "You know? It's this brown stuff? I forgot what it's called, but it's very fizzy?" "Coke?" "Oh yes, Coke!"

I guess I should be pretty proud of the fact that my five-year-old doesn't remember what Coke is. Way to go public healther!

II. "I speak three languages"
Ben: "You know what, mama? I actually speak three languages--English, Chinese, and Chinglish!"

III. "Feeling nervous"
I went to the kindergarten information night on Wednesday and reported back to the family what I learned about Ben's upcoming year in the kindergarten. The next morning, he woke up, came up, and said to me, "I was thinking about kindergarten when I was going to sleep, and, and it made me feel... you know, kind of... kind of... nervous." I said, "of course a big change for you so I can see why it makes you a little nervous, but you at least already know who your teachers will be, because they will be the same teachers as Noah, Mrs. Cooper and Mrs. Fortin." Ben: "But you know mama? I don't think I know which is which..."

I thought for a little kid, he's quite aware of his emotions. I love my sweet Ben :)

Reading Iliad, seventeen years later....

The boys have been reading the Iliad with Paul, which Noah picked out from his school library. Though a kid-friendly version, it still sounds confusing and too complicated for my level. As they are sitting there completely absorbed into the gods' entangled relationships, I can't help being reminded of seventeen years ago, just a year after I started speaking English, my literature class assigned the reading of the Iliad and the Odessy. I completely freaked out and cried night after night, not knowing even how and where to begin comprehending even a piece of these epic stories. Finally, someone kindly noted that there exist such a thing as the Cliff Notes. I rushed to the bookstore and bought them immediately. The trouble continued, as I realized I couldn't even understand these Yellow/Black booklets!?! Going to class was terribly embarrassing, as I sat in the very back row never daring to make an eye contact with the professor, fearing that I would be called upon when I was completely lost. One semester later, I realized that having a name of "Wen Ying Chou" was great, as many professors don't dare to try and pronounce it. In such difficult and language-intense classes, I made sure I don't let them know that I go by Sylvia!

Seventeen years later, my boys--only five and seven-- are chatting all about Agamemnon and Achilles!!! Very weird and surreal.....

A weird dream.

I can't believe it... in my dream last night I shook hands with... of all people, General Chiang Kai-shek! He was scarily larger than life... And his wife Madame Chiang was sitting next to me on the other end. I was surrounded by those big people, and all the generals and soldiers watching.
I didn't dare to say anything, just smiled and sensed the hugeness of his hand...

We are actually going back to work/school!

After almost two weeks of snow days and long days at home, it's hard to believe all shall resume after all the snow snow snow! This forced break has been a gift as far as I am concerned, giving time to spend together, slow down, carefree play time in the snow, friendly neighborhood gatherings/playdates, and gratitude for being able to stay warm and fed--knowing that many suffered greatly because of the storms.

Since we were lucky to have my parents visiting these past weeks, I noticed how much more willing Ben is to speak Chinese. He looks for opportunities to converse in Chinese! It's heart-warming for me to hear him try and make such an effort. This is an additional gift for the historic snowy DC, 2010!

Featuring our Guest Blogger: Naked on My Wedding Day

Last week just before the snowstorm struck I visited a bridal boutique to try on some wedding gowns for the very first time in the merry company of my sister and mother. I have been extremely delighted and thankful at the prospect of being married to the man *beyond* my dreams, but somehow assuming the role of a bride, whatever it may be, has been a rite of passage that I have to struggle with to integrate into my still premature understanding of marriage. I slipped in and out of something like 20 or 30 white dresses, and it was actually a
lot of fun(!), straightjacketing myself into amazingly elegant or sassy gowns and seeing how each dress brings out something different in (or in spite of) me. It was only when we came home and showed pictures of me in gowns to Noah and Ben (two individuals you can ALWAYS count on for honest, good-natured, and thoughtful comments) that the true face of wedding attires revealed itself. Noah saw the pictures and immediately disapproved them, almost scathingly—“But you look naked!” referring to their strapless tops. That I should look “naked” in one of the most important days of my life is beyond Noah’s imagination. So we tried to explain that our bodies are beautiful, too, especially if they are healthy and toned, and that showing off
some parts of them can enhance the overall aesthetics, or something like that. Noah listened and said, “If muscles are beautiful, and men have more muscles than women, then shouldn’t the groom be the naked one?” Like always, Noah is of course totally right. Much of the ritual of weddings is about the reinforcement of the normativity of gender stereotypes, and I am most certain the process does not end with bridal gowns, nor with weddings.

Ben on the other hand, found inspirations in my many bridal guises, and immediately took to composing the following picture. I shall try to be as lovely a bride as Ben imagines me to be on my wedding day.

I am not my belly

Ben: "My belly really hurts!"

Paul: "Where exactly does it hurt?"

Ben: "I am not my belly, so how would I know Daddy?"

.... That raises an epistemological question doesn't it?

Refuse to be..

...a Matron of Honor.


Yes, you heard me, somehow the term connotes to me, an uptight, slightly wide, serious and maybe unforgiving, lady of some age. No! I shall be simply called, gladly, Sister of the Bride :)

Yes, you heard me too! Big news in the family. Ashin's engaged to be married!! We are thrilled. I couldn't sleep when I heard the news--Paul said I seemed to be more excited than the bride herself! Ten years after our engagement, my little sister is getting ready to walk down the isle...

On the occasion of our ninth anniversary today, I wish her and her fiance happiness, and a fulfilling and fruitful journey to this marriage business :)

Is that your special ingredient?

Noah noticed in his Udon noodle soup a hair... "There's hair in my soup, mama!" I took it out. Ben looked at me said, in a perfectly sarcastic tone: "What? is that your special ingredient? Hair?"

Paul and I just laughed... This mere four-year-old seems to get his sarcasm down.. It was hilarious...