Benjamin has been quite a stubborn little fella lately, and I now wonder whether there's really something to this idea of a "Terrible Two". (I didn't believe it before, as Noah didn't seem to have any real terror phase at this age). Actually, Ben's kind of driving me crazy at times. I think back to our interactions ever since he's born, he seems to have won most of the battles. When he insists on something, such as a bottle of milk or a little car to bring along on the road, he usually gets his way. Don't mistaken us for being wimpy parents without principle: we try to stick to our rules, and we do often let him cry and throw a fit. But, somehow, at the end, he gets his way. I hope this is not a sign of a strong-minded difficult teen!
Last night, he woke up at 5am again demanding for neinei. I made up my mind not to give in, as he's been waking up at early morning hours just wanting a bottle, and we know he doesn't need it. After 20 minutes of complaining, I went in, and he started begging for neinei, looking all cute and miserable, I offered water, to which he vehemently refused with a loud and firm "didi bu yao!" (Younger brother does not want (it)!) He then proceeded to saying "mama gei neinei" (Mommy gets milk) Anyway, after close to 45 minutes of whining and crying, I gave in... Paul and I both needed a little more sleep after all. When I did give him a bottle, he said, looking all sweet, "xiexie mama" (thank you mama!) I can't believe it! He does the same tricks at school with his teacher.
Ben can be so sweet and so devilish within seconds! He can melt your heart with his smile and sweet words, and one minute later he tests your patience and temperament with such nasty attitude! Some days I figure, it's not worth the fight. We should just let him be him and simply teach him right from wrong as he grows. But on other days, I feel that the more he is stubborn, the more I should not cave in. He needs to know who the boss is--and it's not him!
Any advice or suggestions or similar parenting experience? HELP!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Happy Holidays, Sylvia! I don't have any advice but can relate -- my sweet son had terribel two, three and more! Thinking back, I feel kids who have strong personalities appear to be very stubborn and even defiant in caretakers' eyes. I've learned or I should say I'm still learning not to beat up myself for Dylan's "misbehaviors" and try to understand him from his perspective. The good side of it is that his determination becomes a positive force in his development as he grows older. I think some of the "terrible two" issue relate to the desire for independence (not only from you the parents but from his older brother!) and sense of control. The conflict between their desires (or curiocities) and actual ability becomes painfully sharp for them (and the parents). As for the request/insistence for the milk in early mornings, is there a possibility that your little boy actually is really hungry? Some kids become hungry really fast and the "normal" schedule or common sense doesn't work for them. As you know so well, the state of stomach is the central control of their behaviors even for the older boys ;-).
Thanks Ginny.. It helps to hear what other people go through! It'll surely be interesting to see how he turns out later and whether this stubbornness/persistence continues.
Post a Comment